S2 E12 Fallen Idol (Lost Episode!!!)

S2, E12 Fallen Idol
Bobby's BFF from college Guzzler shows up out of the blue. Pam is NOT impressed! They stay out all night drinking, sexually harass waitresses and basically act like a couple of douchecanoe dude bros. Pam is even MORE unimpressed - MOSTLY after Guzzler hits on her... several times. Guzzler also hits on 17 year old Lucy. *serious side eye* Pam and JR actually agree on something for the first time - Guzzler is a dick and needs to go. JR is mostly concerned because Guzzler is trying to get Bobby to build a shopping center on Section 40 of Southfork! He quickly finds out that Guzzler is a con artist.
The actor who played Guzzler, Richard Kelton, unfortunately died before this episode even aired, as he was killed from accidental carbon monoxide poisoning in his trailer while on a film set. Poor one out for Richard!  
This episode was recorded on a Friday Night (Dallas night!) so the alcohol was flowing. Join us, won't you? 
 
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S2 E24 John Ewing III Part 2

The one where Sue Ellen breaks out of the institution, steals a car and runs into a tree! Oh, and John Ross is born. 
Sue Ellen has been committed. Girl is NOT happy about it! She's lounging in her own pity party whilst wearing pearls and panty hose in her room. Shady nurse takes advantage and trades her booze in a mouth wash bottle for her pearl necklace (and you know those babies are real!) She won't see JR and 100% loses it when Bobby comes to see her. She ends up sneaking out, stealing a gaddam car and getting into the most ridiculous accident in the world. Did I mention we meet Murial for the first time? This is the season 2 cliff hanger episode ya'll!  
 
 
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S2 E23 John Ewing III, Part 1

The one where Sue Ellen is institutionalized.
Sue Ellen is in her 7th month of pregnancy, and 7th drink of the day... and it's 2pm. Girl is drankin' in the parking lot of her Ob/gyn appointment from a flask! It's... not great, Bob. Luckily for Sue Ellen, people in the 70s didn't seem to think drinking whilst pregnant is all that bad (WHAT?!). But when her doc calls her out on being wasted at her appointment, she's finally warned to sober up. Sue Ellen is all, "do you EVEN know who I am?" *serious side-eye* This is the episode before the season finale, so everything is starting to hit the fan. Also, Lucy masks her sadness with some mysterious red pills that make her messed up and HILARIOUS! We think maybe they're Quaaludes, but since we are too young to really know what quaaludes are... who knows! Also, prepare for some Queen Miss Ellie action! Girl has finally had ENOUGH! We also talk about barbecue, 70s drugs that aren't around anymore (angel dust, anyone?) and party fouls. 
 
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S2 E22 The Outsiders

Season 2, Episode 22: The Outsiders
Original Airdate: 16 March 1979
Written by Leonard Katzman 
Directed by Dennis Donnelly 
 
The one where Ray meets Donna.  
The Ewings are having trouble with both Cliff Barnes at the OLM and the Mainwaring family (guess they're mad about Lucy "calling off the wedding...." *eye roll*) So, they enlist the help of Senator Sam Culver. Sam, who is old as FAQ, is married to Bobby's college friend Donna - age 28. (We have some questions...)Meanwhile, Ray meets a hot babe in a bar. Her name is... Donna. Uh oh. 
Drama ensues!Also, the DOA asks Miss Ellie's help in getting Sue Ellen to step down as President, because girl is crunk at errrry meeting! 
 
 
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S2 E21 Royal Marriage

Season 2, Episode 21: Royal Marriage
Original Airdate: 09 March 1979
Written by Camille Marchetta 
Directed by Gunnar Hellström
 
The one where Dallas was ahead of its time in treating a gay character well.  Lucy is dating Kit Mainwaring. They a super attractive couple who go to a lot of discos and... play a lot of backgammon! Truth be told, Kit is giving off a lot of "Friends Zone" vibes that 18 year old Lucy is just not picking up on. She does notice when he flat out refuses to even feel her up, but she totally ignores that sign. Girl has never actually had a good relationship, so how is she to know?! The Ewings approve of her relationship because Kit Mainwaring is from an Oil Family™, and they actually start acting like she's part of the family. After being pressured into it, Kit proposes and Lucy accepts. Trouble is... our boy Kit is gay. He soon realizes that he can't go through with the marriage. He comes out to both Bobby and Lucy who handle if very well for 1979! And turns out JR knew the the whole time and was just like ¯_(ツ)_/¯ . 
This episode gets many more bourbons than usual from us. We also welcome Melanie from Ultimate Dallas to the Barbecue! 
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S2 E20: Call Girl

Season 2, Episode 20: Call Girl 
This is the one where they play a lot of racketball! Bobby really wants Pam to come back to live at Southfork. JR does NOT! Instead of moving back, Pam decides to randomly move in with a friend, named LeeAnn, who  she meets on the set of a photoshoot for The Store. (What is Pam's actual joooooobbbb?????!!!!) At the racketball club (is that a thing?) Pam and LeeAnn run into JR. Tension! JR and LeeAnn have a past! He calls her... Amber??? Uh oh! JR decides to use LeeAnn in a scheme to keep Pam away. 
 
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S2 E19 Sue Ellen's Sister

Season 2, Episode 19: Sue Ellen's Sister
 
Sue Ellen's little sister visits Southfork - invited by JR. JR puts the attractive (and barely 18) Kristin in front of Bobby, who is depressed because Pam refuses to come back to Southfork to live. Bobby doesn't hate it. Sue Ellen and Lucy see through Kristin's attempts to woo the married Bobby and spend the entire episode heavily side-eying her. 
We link all of this somehow with a discussion of All in the Family, Song of the South and Pee Wee's Big Adventure. Grab a bourbon and join us! 
 
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S2 E18 The Red File - Part 2

Julie's DEAD! And guess who decided to go visit her apartment and put his fingerprints ERRRWHERE?! Our old buddy Cliff, that's who! Cliff... Cliff... Cliff... Now he's on trial for murder and the only one who can help is... a Ewing? 
 
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S2 E17 The Red File - Part 1

SEASON 2, EPISODE 17: THE RED FILE, PART 1
 
JR and Julie Grey are back on gettin' it on, but since Julie cheated on JR once with Cliff Barnes... he just doesn't trust her anymore. While they're out of town, he has her apartment searched for any copies of The Red File. He has hired horrible people, so they don't find the key that's hidden IN HER JEWELRY BOX!  Oh yeah, Jules 100% made copies like a badass! Only JR isn't the only one who doesn't trust her - Willie Joe Garr and Jeb Ames from the Cartel have her phone bugged. When they find out she really does have the stuff, they go to her apartment to get it from her like a bunch of creeps. Bad things ensue (Peace out, Julie) and poor ole Cliff has awful timing, per usual. It's hijinks with answering machines on this episode of Dallas! 
 
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S2 E16 Julie's Return

Season 2, Episode 16: Julie's Return! 
Julie Grey (Tina Louise from Gilligan's Island) has returned to Dallas from a short stint in New York. She doesn't tell anyone she's back, and soon after starts stalking Jock. Eventually, she woos him with her sweater dresses, feathered hair and listening skills! The two become inseparable for lunch dates, shopping sprees and quiet dinners at Julie's apartment (uh oh....). That is until Queen Miss Ellie finds out and asserts her god given power. All the while, Jock is feeling less than because of his health issues. Bobby is worried about his parents breaking up, and JR is worried about The Red File™. Pam overreacts, Sue Ellen drinks, and Lucy is studying for a History exam???? (Maybe the most surprising thing in the episode!) 
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(FYI, we are not sponsored by either of these companies - we just really like them!)
 
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